Falling for you

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Falling for you – From “the fruits of adultery“

Verse 1

I’m falling for you,
but you’re with someone else,
and it’s not fair to you.
I’m falling for you;
it’s barely been a month,
but I think I’m already in love with you.

Bridge 1

And every night you fall asleep by his side,
while I’m stuck imagining
kissing you, touching your thighs.
What can I do?
I have to pretend to be just your friend.
It’s not what I want,
but I’d take anything to stay close to you.

Verse 2

I’m falling for you,
and I swear you felt it too on certain days.
But now I have to push you away.
We got so fucking close,
and now I can’t stand the horror
of not having you.

Bridge 2

So every night alone, when I’m confused,
I message, I spiral,
I do stupid things—
little acts of sabotage,
messages meant to break me and you.
Because I’m terrified
of losing someone I love again.

Verse 3

I fell for you.
Please try to understand,
pushing you away
is how I keep from losing you.
It’s what I’ve always done:
destroying any form of love
before it can hurt me,
or I can hurt you.

Verse 4

I fell for you,
and it isn’t fair to you.
You’re used to the comfort
of an easy daily routine,
and you’re already carrying so much.
How selfish am I
to pile more weight to your life?

Outro

Stability is hard to give up.
I don’t expect you to,
especially for someone
you don’t even know the middle name of.
But damn it,
I’m hurting so much inside.
I’m sorry for the nights
I push you away
when I’m mean,
or I lie,
or twist words,
hoping you’ll start to hate me.
None of it is true.
It’s only so you’ll forget me,
so I don’t feel this
agonizing pressure behind my skull,
the terror of losing someone again.
So I’ve convinced myself I’m bad for you.
I’m sorry.
I love you.

–Written and produced by Matthew P. Haubert · Fracture & Form

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